LDR

I am in a long distance relationship. Every Friday night I rush home to clean the house, and pace anxiously until The Principal arrives. We catch up on the week, have a beer and go to bed. Sometimes I cook so he has a hot meal when he arrives. If not I make sure to have his favorite sandwich fixings. I need a frilly apron with ruffles down the edges, I really do. Last week he walked in the house with a bouquet and a 12 pack. I felt like I'd been transported back to the 50's, and I liked it. The flowers were purple, because he said he knows how much I like purple.

On Saturday, we work on the house or yard or pool, do a little grocery shopping. Maybe stop by Home Depot or even Bed Bath and Beyond. I don't know, its a busy little weekend. I'll try out a new recipe for dinner. Sometimes we go out. I take advantage of him every chance I get. I do his laundry (I don't know why I do it, he doesn't ask and tries to do it himself. I just want to do something for him.)

Sunday he watches football, to my chagrin. On the TV and computer at the same time. I'm pretty sure he gets mobile updates as well. Its disturbing, but we made a deal. I look the other way on the football crap and I get to pick whatever we watch (movies, TV shows) 7 out of 10 times. I sit outside and read a book. We make lunch, talk about what we have going on the next week. He packs and leaves. I go down to CG and clean my offices. When I return home that night, the house is silent, the back yard is silent and I am alone. I stretch out in bed, take up the entire space to ensure I don't get any doggy company in the middle of the night. His pillow still smells like him.

The rest of the week seems to go by uneventfully. I spend the first half missing him, but by the end of the week I almost dread having him come home because I've grown used to my alone time. And he invades it all weekend. But when he's here I like that. Back and forth, my mind goes from missing/needing to independence/self-sufficiency.

I know this routine will change once he closes on his house. Then, he'll be expecting a rotation of states each weekend. I'll be expected to travel every other week to see him. This will get old. We'll take a weekend off. Then it will be every other weekend off. Then we'll break up. Yes, I'm being a pessimist. I just can't see how The Principal will decide to dedicate himself to all the travel and hard work just to have lil ole me do his laundry and pretending to be Holly Homemaker, when quite obviously I'm Holly's defunct cousin who develops hives when forced to dust, fold clothes, or put anything away.

Plus its the end of the week. He'll be home in a few short hours and I'll forget all the negative thoughts again.

First half of the week= Missing my wonderful man. Seeing a future I could share with him and blah, blah blah.

Second half of the week= Rethinking living the rest of my life alone because that is so much simpler than waiting for that freaking shoe to drop.