A few weeks ago after many failed Internet attempts, missing Work Guy, agonizing over what went wrong with The Principal, and trying to help Julie through her bad breakup I called The Principal and left a voice message asking if he wanted me to mail his house title paperwork to him... I found it in the spare bedroom, sneakily hiding in a dresser with his passport. He must need this shit, right? So I looked up his number and called. Voicemail, of course. No response, of course. Not that I could blame him considering the last time I texted him over a year ago he'd told me he was in a "bad place" and it would be better if I stopped contacting him.
Three weeks later I am in LA with Meggie and Jeff and get a response, sooooooooooooo Principal.
He has relocated to Phoenix and can meet me or I can mail his stuff, whatever is easiest... He's back. My stomach rolls. I feel light headed and fail to interact with those around me. It is a funny sort of death when an ex resurfaces.
At the airport I call him back and we agree to meet the following day after my job interview in Arcadia. I have no freaking time to prepare! No time to lose weight or get my hair done! WTF is wrong with me? The only silver lining would be the fact that I will be decked out for my interview and look my best.
Next day I have to wait until late afternoon for my interview, a chance at last to escape the hellhole I currently am chained to. Beside myself with worry about what to say, how to say it, whether they would be interested in, if this is the type of company I might want to work for and full of anxiety over being face to face with The Principal again, every part of me was tied up in itty bitty knots. Then it occurred to me, I would get the job or not, but I feared having the Principal taking his paperwork only to turn heel and walk away from me. Rejection is a stinker.
I texted Principal about our meeting:
Me: Hi, Do you want to grab a drink and get your paperwork or just meet some place to grab and go?
Principal: Drink sounds great. Have a place in mind?
I know it is text but is it just me or does he not seem too excited about the idea of getting a drink(singular)?
Me: Great. No idea on place. I would be coming from Arcadia. Any suggestions?
Principal: So your around camelback?
The fact that he miss-spelled you're made me think of Work Guy and feel queasy.
Me: Yep.
Principal: Rosie McAffrey's is on 10th and camelback.
Yeah, I know where it is, asshole. It's where we had our first date and our one year anniversary. Is he being ironic or nostalgic or just simply forgot because it hadn't really mattered?
Me: Sounds good.
I walked into the interview right on time to meet the CEO and VP of Sales from a small senior living company planning to open a new community in Arcadia. I was slightly nervous, but the type of nerves I have a tendency to get when forced to speak with strangers about how great I think I am. I gave honest answers about how much I loved the work I used to do and felt I would be successful doing it again. I got a "You're not married?!" from the VP when I talked about having a very quiet social life. Normally, I would never admit this, but I felt GREAT about the meeting. Knowing that they may very well choose someone more qualified with better connections wasn't lost on me. However, when you leave an interview talking about common interests outside of business you kind of feel like you hit it home.
Walking out of the hotel conference area I was given the once over by several men. Obviously I picked the proper outfit for meeting with an ex. Slinky dress, that could be pulled straight to be appropriate for a work function or ruched up a bit to be funky. Black tights with a vertical pattern to make my legs look longer. High heels. Standard blown out hair, not trying too hard but simple. I felt good, so why was my stomach threatening to drop every 30 seconds?
When I walked onto the patio at Rosie's my heart fluttered. There was the Principal smiling up. He looked the same, maybe a little leaner in the face. Best of all, he didn't look like he hated me. On the contrary, he appeared very pleased to see me. Told me I look great. Hugged me earnestly. Hmmm, don't start analyzing....
He launched into his life right away. Had volunteered with his company to go to Africa to help with some software update, anything to get out of New Mexico, and it had yielded him a promotion that brought him back to Phoenix in July. Now he travels the world to help trouble shoot and launch new software. This explains why it took him 3 weeks to respond to my voicemail. He is happy. Angus was boarded with a guy back in New Mexico who fell in love with him and the Principal let him stay. No mention of any relationship. people don't normally say they are blatantly single but will usually bring up a current girlfriend while having drinks(plural) with an ex, right?
I talked about my life for a while. All in all it was a good conversation and we stayed a lot longer than I thought we would with out any type of awkwardness.
Now I will analyze:
He brought up how people can change and about telling me he was in a bad place, drinking too much for a while after we broke up.
I was blatant about how unhappy I would have been in New Mexico.
He apologized about his difficulties talking about emotions.
I expressed my belief that people either settle for a relationship in order to not be alone, find someone they can be a partner with or chose to wait.
He insisted on buying the drinks, and urged me to stay for another.
It was very casual talk, but was there something underneath it? I don't know why I bother to think about these things at all.
He walked me to my car where I produced his stuff. Another earnest hug. The Principal said "This was fun" and for some unknown reason I said "Yeah, it was." (and I meant it) "Let me know if you want to get together again sometime" (and I meant that too, much to my surprise.)
I drove home wondering why I had put that out there. Did I want to hang out with him again? Could we be just friends? Would I want more? Would he? Is that a good idea after the way our last relationship went? I decided just to go with the flow. Right, like I can do that.
Me: Thank you for hanging out. I was worried about it, but it was fun :-)
Principal: I hope to be able to do it again :-) minus the worrying as I had it just as much
Such a quick response from him made me wonder if people can change... "hope to be able to do it again" Does that mean he is going to ask me out, or what? Do I expect something?
Me: Absolutely :-) Glad it wasn't just me!
I hadn't expected to hear anything from the job interview for at least a week. When I got home from yoga Thursday night I had a voicemail from the VP of Sales asking that I give her a call back. She informed me that they were very impressed by me, loved my personality and what I had to say. They wanted to fly me to Colorado to do a final interview and so I could see their communities. After I got off the phone I jumped up and down like a complete spaz! They liked me! They really, really liked me! I am going back to making lots of money again! In a state of bliss I called my mom and texted every person in my phone, including the Principal. I was so hyper excited I barely slept at all that night, tossing and turning, mentally preparing for a job I didn't have yet but was now confident I wanted and would get. The only down side was that the Principal didn't bother to text back for 12 hours.
And I haven't heard from him since. I guess I read him wrong. If he was even entertaining the notion of reuniting, wouldn't he have asked me out again? Here I sit on a Saturday afternoon with nothing to do and he's probably doing the same. Even if he was bored, wouldn't he want to call me?
No. The Principal would never think like that. People never change.
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